My boyfriend  told me not to talk to him at night because all I do is pick on him, the condo president (and his wife) yelled at me for requesting to use the recreation room, the clerk at the supermarket glared when I inserted the credit card chip the wrong way, my friend was upset because I hadn’t invited her for Thanksgiving dinner and the guy at the automatic car-wash swore when I left the emergency brake on while the car was in the wash thingy.

Why?  What did I do that was so terrible?  I didn’t insert the chip wrong on purpose, I didn’t realize Thanksgiving was so close ”of course I was going to invite you” and I would have been happy to release the brake if I had known that it was important. If you’re supposed to do that why don’t they have a sign saying so—or does everyone in the world but me know this?

In retrospect though, these were just the opening acts.  The stars of the evening were the condo president (and his wife) and my boy friend.

The condo where I live has a really nice recreation room which is supposedly available to the residents with prior notice and a deposit.  I wanted to reserve the room for three dates so I left a note requesting a few mornings and one evening and I left a check for the deposit.   A few hours later I got a phone call from the president’s wife.

“We want to talk to you, we want to know what kind of meeting you are having.”  I told her it was a rehearsal for my little play reading group.  Well, you would have thought I said it was a rehearsal for my little orgy group.  She got angry. She got  angrier and then she became abusive. She called me a liar’ she said she couldn’t trust me and  that there was no way, “not going to happen” that I was going to use that room–ever!

“Okay,okay,” I said.  “I’ll have the meeting somewhere else but we would like to have the room for our holiday party.”No way. I don’t believe you; I think you’re bull__________ me,” she said and when I objected to her language she sneered.

”No way. I don’t believe you; I think you’re bull__________ me,” she said and when I objected to her language she sneered.

“What? Is it too much for your virgin ears?”  Her husband (the president) got on the line and said, in a very ominous voice, ”Barbara Fox, I’m going to take this up with my board.”

They both acted like they hated me, like I had done something terrible. Why?  Before this we had a friendly and cordial relationship.

So, I did what any normal human being (woman) would do.  I told my boy friend.  He listened, said a few things about how wrong they were and then he went back to eating dinner.  That didn’t seem right to me. I kept going over and over it in my mind and I finally went to him and asked him, in a perfectly reasonable voice, why he didn’t defend me when I told him about the condo president (and his wife) yelling at me.  I wanted comfort.  I wanted a hero.  I wanted him to say things like “no one talks to my girl-friend like that” and “I’ll kill the ____” and  ” just wait till I get my hands on him.” I wanted him to roll up his sleeves, flex his muscles and stuff like that.  After he said and did all that  I of course, would have said something like “Oh honey, it was nothing: don’t get so upset.”

Then he would kiss me and it would be forgotten and we’d have a nice evening.  Instead, he got mad—at me! He got angry—at me!  He yelled. He slammed the door.  He said he was tired after working all day (and playing Pickleball) and that I always picked on him and not to talk to him at night.

I really don’t like having people angry at me so. I’ve made some decisions.   I’ll pay cash at the store, I’ll give my friend a blanket invitation for the holidays, I’ll never forget to release the brake, I’ll have the party in my apartment and  I’m sitting here waiting for my boy friend to come home so I can not talk to him.